


Urge

by 0Death_to_Usernames0



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Angry Sex, Bickering, Drunk Oswald Cobblepot, Drunk Victor Zsasz, Duct Tape, Fight Sex, Gonna be some slow burn, Ivy is a sneaky little minx, Jealousy, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Polyamory, Possible future threesome, Sassy Zsaszy, Smut, Whiskey - Freeform, Work In Progress, childish Zsasz, funky town, future fluff, gonna be longer than I planned, kinda rapey, plot if you squint, put the rape tag for caution but it's really just a bit of hate sex, some dialogue from the show, sometime in s4
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-26
Updated: 2018-04-08
Packaged: 2019-04-08 07:17:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14100210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/0Death_to_Usernames0/pseuds/0Death_to_Usernames0
Summary: Fries finds a temporary cure for himself and wants Oswald. This makes Zsasz's position feel jeopardized. He catches freeze kissing Oswald in the lounge and his jealousy flares. Freeze is desperate to feel the warmth of another and Zsasz crosses his path.-Zsasz is a bit out of character and I apologize. I didn't really know how to write him in this role. I hope it gets better as I continue this fic. Fries and Zsasz have angry sex. It's kinda rapey feeling so I put the tag in just in case. I haven't edited so comments and criticism are welcome.





	1. Stuck between a bed and a hard thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zsasz sees a snowman kissing a penguin. Fighting ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own anything except the terrible plot. I'd be cool if I did, but I don't.

"Morning boss." Zsasz walks into the office and leans against a wall as two of his girls drag in a man with a bag over his head. "We caught him at the docks. He pleads that he won't betray you again if you give him another chance." Zsasz makes a face of mock pity and pulls the bag off the poor man.  
"I-I promise I will be loyal from now on, you don't understand! They-they threatened me." The sobbing man began begging for his life.  
Oswald held his hand out, his ring glimmering. "Prove your loyalty."  
Zsasz chimed in with a whisper of, "kiss the ring." The man hastily crawled over to Oswald on his hands and knees and grabbed the kingpins hand. As he kissed the ring, Oswald glanced up at Zsasz and nodded. Victors knowing smirk turned to a toothy smile as he pulled a gun from it's holster and shot the man, blood splattered onto Oswalds hand. The girls took the body away and called the cleanup crew. Victor stepped into the bathroom, wetted a rag, and returned to the kingpin. He knelt down on one knee and gently began to wipe the blood from his bosses hand. He hears the man above him begin to speak. "You would never betray me, would you Victor?" Their lines of sight connected and the bald man responded.  
"I'd sooner put a bullet in my own head." The penguins eye lashes fluttered as he chuckled.  
"If you betray me, I'd expect you to do just that." Oswald began to pull his hand away but Zsasz grasped it and kissed his palm.  
"I can't see myself betraying someone as entertaining as you, for example, that man you just had me shoot. You knew he was being sincere but you still had me kill him. You're ruthless and I find that a wonderful trait." He stood up and returned the washcloth to the bathroom.  
Oswald spoke up, "All it would take for him to turn again is for him to think he can get away with it. I've made the mistake before and I'm not inclined to do it again. What's on my agenda for today?" He asked as he poured whiskey into a glass.  
"Today is relatively uneventful. The snowman downstairs made an appointment with you, it's about a cure. Other than that, it's just paperwork and a meeting later tonight at 9:30. Boss?" Victor looked up. Oswald was beginning to peel off his blood soiled clothes. Soon, the man was just in tight boxer briefs. Zsasz quietly hummed while watching the king pin make his way to the closet.  
"I guess I can dress a bit more casual today then. Can you send a runner to take this to Olga at the mansion? She is great at getting blood out of clothing."  
"Of course chief. Um, you have casual clothes?" He quickly told one of the guards to take the dressy outfit to a runner.  
The king of Gotham just laughed as he searched his closet. "Of course I do. I just don't dress casually as often because people fear a well dressed man much more than an ordinarily dressed one." He slipped on a tight black turtleneck and a blazer over it. Black corduroy pants followed.  
"I suppose that is true, though I feel you would still get quite a bit of attention if you dressed like this every day." Zsasz sucked in a breath at how the pants cupped Oswalds ass. He let out a whistle. "You must be quite popular when I'm not around to keep wandering eyes off the merchandise."  
"Ha, I'm not particularly interested in that sort of thing. I've never even kissed another person, much less anything else." He strode back to his chair and crossed his legs as he downed another shot of whiskey.  
"Hm, not one person has gotten your attention in that way? Well, besides the green popsicle." Victor stepped closer to the kingpin and leaned on the desk.  
"A few, but I've never acted on my feelings." Oswald fluttered his eyelashes as he poured more whiskey into his glass. An alarm playing funky town went off in Victors pocket.  
"Well, time for you to go see the snowman. Would you like me to come with?" Zsasz questioned, he knew he wouldn't be tagging along. The other Victor doesn't seem to care much for the assassin.  
"No, I'll be quite alright by myself. You are dismissed to do whatever it is you do when you aren't with me." Zsasz nodded.  
"Ok boss." He left the room and decided he'd go have fun torturing a mark in their own basement.  
\-------  
Penguin grabbed his cane and began to head down to the lab. The small elevator door opened and Fries was standing there wearing a tight fitted white shirt and grey lounging pants. "Fries! You found the cure?!" Penguin squealed a bit.  
Victor chuckled and responded."It's only temporary. It lasts around 24 hours and I have to wait 3 days in between uses but I'm much closer to finding a permanent solution."  
"That is wonderful! What do you plan on doing with this temporary freedom?"  
"I want to remember what is feels like to embrace someone, to desire someone. I want to kiss, touch, and make love to someone." Freeze sighs thoughtfully.  
"A specific person in mind?" Oswald asks. Fries crowds the king of Gotham to a wall and kisses him.  
\----  
Zsasz had forgotten a contract paper in the lounge and quickly made his way back inside. He hears Oswald's muffled voice and takes the moan as a destress sound and goes to investigate the shuffling. He pauses and looks around the corner. He blinks a few times in surprise at what he saw. A snowman and a penguin? He hates how fitting it is. He gets a feeling in his gut that he has to intervene. "Boss." He attracts both men's eyes. Electric blue glaring eyes matched his gaze. "I just wanted to tell you that one of the guys who will be at the meeting has been in cahoots with Falcones men. You need to personally make an example of him tonight. The girls want to discuss it with great detail. I suppose it can wait if you want to continue your first kiss." He snickered a bit as Oswald's freckles became visible as he blushed.  
"If it's all the same I'll go see them now. Alert them that I'm coming." He quickly skittered away. Zsasz dials his main lady and tells her that Mr. Cobblepot is on his way. He puts his phone away and turns to exit the hall.  
"You stopped me. Jealous? I didn't know it was his first but I'm glad you didn't get it." Freeze stared Zsasz down.  
"There are other firsts I could take. Much more important ones than your icy kiss. I bet it was like kissing a dead fish." Zsasz's mouth twisted up into a shit eating grin. It was wiped off his face by a swift punch. "Hey, that was mean." He dodged another hit. "He's a virgin so I'm not sure you could've gotten what you wanted without forcing yourself on him." He dodged again. The next one landed. "Aw jeez, I felt that one." Zsasz turned and ran up the stairs. He wishes he had memorized the layout of this place. He makes it to the guest room and realizes he's cornered as Fries walks in the door. He goes for his guns but the straps are yanked and his guns taken away. Then he goes for his blades but his wrists are caught and suddenly he's airborne. His back slams into a chair. "Jesus Fuck Me!" Zsasz yelped.  
"I will." Fries says as he grabs the other Victor by the ankle and drags him underneath him.  
"What the hell! You've got to be kidding. I hate you!" Zsasz struggled to get away and kicked Fries in his balls. The man exhaled hard holding his legs together. Zsasz stands up and kicks Fries a few times. Zsasz gasps as his foot is pulled out from under him and he's rolled underneath the white haired man.  
"Haven't you heard of angry sex? I just need to feel the heat of the moment. You're going to help me with that." At those words the smaller Victor struggled with renewed interest in getting away. He's always been on top and he doesn't plan on bottoming for this dick.  
"I've heard of it, just not interested." He went to kick him in the nuts again but his leg is grabbed and wrapped around the waist of his captor. He feels something stiff grind onto his thigh. "Hell no, get off of me." He twists himself over and grabs a fallen notepad then chucks it into Freezes face.  
"Really? Man you are a lot easier to subdue then I thought yo-" he stops as the smaller man slips from underneath him and heads for the door. Zsasz gets out of the door and walks briskly down the hall and slides into Oswald's office closing and locking the door behind him. He sits on the couch contemplating how to get out of the lounge. That was close, Zsasz thinks as he reclines in exhaustion. He wipes the blood from his lip. Hope he gave up. He hears keys in the lock and expects Oswald but instead he's met with steely blue eyes.  
"How did you get in here?" Zsasz quickly gets into a defensive stance.  
"I just told Oswald that I found a leak from here that drips into my lab. He gave me the key so I could lock up when I'm done fiddling with the pipes. I also sent him on a bit of a wild goose chase so he wouldn't be around for a bit." He began walking towards his smaller counterpart. Zsasz stood behind the coffee table trying to keep distance between them. Instead of trying to chase the smaller Victor around the table he simply went up and over, tackling him to the couch. He wrapped a hand around Zsasz's mouth, trying to cut off his air. He yanked his hand away bleeding from the teeth below.  
"You're gonna have to better than that to stop me from getting away." Zsasz punched the icy man in his nose making him lift his weight off of him. Zsasz got out from under him again and headed for the door.  
"Not again." Fries quickly caught up and wrapped his hands around the attempted escapees neck and began to strangle him. Blunt nails clawed at his hands but he didn't relent until the gasping noises stopped and the body he held went limp. He checked for a pulse. Good, not dead. He picked the limp body up into his arms and brought the body back up to the half destroyed guest room and laid him on the bed. He went and got some duct tape for the assassins hands should he try to get away again. When he got to the room he saw that Zsasz was rousing from his lack of oxygen induced sleep. He crawled on top of the man and stripped him of his clothes except his tight fitting underwear. He waited till he was fully awake before testing the need to tape him. A hand went for a slap but was easily stopped and it flopped uselessly back to the bed. Good, no need to waste tape.  
"Stop. Please." The assassin pleaded through tired eyes. He felt weak and he ached all over. If he can't fight his way out of this sticky situation, maybe he can talk his way out. He's seen penguin do it often enough.  
"Now you ask nicely? Where did your unflappable attitude go? Well, I have a bloody nose and I'm hard. Surely you can see why I'm not inclined to let you go." He began to knead the smaller mans thighs as he tried to smoothly slide himself between his legs. A hand presses against his chest. "Don't resist me." He practically growled the words out.  
"Will you at least be gentle about it?" It feels like there's no way out of the situation so Zsasz tries to at least convince him to go easy on him.  
"Sorry, but that's unlikely. It has been years after all, and you're tough. Maybe next time I'll go easier."  
Zsasz scoffed."Next time? I won't be caught dead with my pants down around you EVER again." He feels a bit of his strength returning but waits for an opportunity.  
"You can try to avoid me but there will be another time." Fries leaned down and kissed Victor. A soft kiss surprisingly. He licked his lips asking entrance but none was granted. "That was me trying to be nice. You still refused me. One more chance for me to make this better for you. Let. Me. In." He returned to the smaller mans lips once more. This time, access was granted and Fries moans as his tongue is engulfed by the warmth of the others mouth. He pulled away and jerked his shirt off. He pulled his erection from his pants and lubed it up with lotion from the bedside table and lined himself up at the quivering hole beneath him. "Ready?"  
"No preparation?" Zsasz questioned seriously. He made direct eye contact and tried to plead with his eyes.  
"Fine, but only because you look super hot when you're being submissive." He replaced his cock with a finger and pushed it in.  
"Fuck, that's just a finger? I never imagined that this is how I'd die." A second was worked in. "Wait wait wait, no. You're going too fast. I can't take it." He gasped and fisted one hand in the comforter and threw the other over his face.  
"Come on, I want to see you unravel. Making someone naturally dominant submit is an amazing site to behold. Move your hands." To punctuate his meaning he thrust and twisted his fingers inside. Zsasz grunted in discomfort and tried to wiggle away. "Don't run away." He grabs a hip and pulls him back down onto his fingers.  
"Gh! Ouch, god dammit you big fingered fuck!" He used the last of his energy to swing his arm out and shove Fries off of him. He succeeded in knocking his attacker off but overestimated his ability to get out of the room. He barely got to the edge of the bed before he was knocked out again.  
"I thought you'd know better by now. " He says as he caresses the sleeping face. He secures the smaller mans hands behind his back with the duct tape and started patting his face to wake him.  
"Ughmm.. I'd hoped this was some bad dream but I guess I'm not that lucky. Your face okay sugar pie honey bunch?" Two fingers are roughly shoved into his hole and a breathy yelp comes from his mouth.  
"Just dandy since I can let loose now." He finger fucked the man below him in earnest now, relishing in the gasps and breathy moans from the assassin. "Feeling better now?" He leaned down and kissed the man hard as he removed his fingers to replace them with something much bigger. The fleshy ring of muscle gave way to the tip of the offending dick. A silent scream from Zsasz was followed by a bite to Freezes lip. The taller man pulled his face away. "Why is biting your go to attack, it's getting pretty annoying." He wiped the blood from his lip and pushed in until the resistance won and he couldn't go any further. "Would you please relax, I can't get in all the way." He groaned as he tried to push in more.  
"Fucking hell. Stop pushing! I thought you said you'd go easy on me. Oh god just how big are you?"  
"That was before you punched me in the face. You want another chance?" He thrusted again and managed an inch deeper.  
"Yes yes yes, god yes please it hurts."  
"Okay. Next time though, I'll be as rough as I want." He pulled out slowly and added more lubrication before pushing back in.  
"Can we make a deal?"  
"About what? You're getting fucked right now no matter what so if you're gonna ask me to stop-"  
"No that's not it. Ow can you at least cease your thrusting while I talk? Geez... I will willingly let you do your worst next time... if you let me be Oswald's first."  
"Fine, he probably wouldn't be able to handle even a gentle me for his first time. But one condition, let me watch you take him. I won't stop you from getting a bit rough even if he asks me to. Unless you intend to damage him beyond repair, then of course I'd have to step in."  
"Deal, okay now hurry up and come so I can leave."  
"Do you want me to hurry or to be gentle, you're sending me mixed signals."  
"Gentle." He then gasped as he was pulled onto Fries's lap, still impaled on his dick.  
"I've read that this position makes it easier on the submissive partner. Ride me." Freeze leaned back on one hand, using the other to hold a bony and scarred hip. "You sure have killed a lot of people. I have an assassin riding my dick." He chuckled, caressing the tally marks.  
"Fuck you." Zsasz says as he slowly lowers himself on the man under him.  
"No, I'm fucking you." Fries comments as he pulls the scarred man all the way down.  
Zsasz gasps and tries to lift back up. "It's too deep." Blue eyes just watch him as he struggles to adjust. He lifts up and slowly goes back down again until he's got a steady pace and both are groaning at the feeling. "Okay this is better, it might even have felt good if my insides weren't raw from you man handing me earlier." He scoffs a bit at his own remark realizing the whole thing was partially his own fault.  
"I'm gonna cum soon, you should brace yourself." Zsasz looked confused for a second then immediately started sweating a bit.  
"You aren't going to do that inside of me." He stated it like it was a fact.  
"What position are you in to tell me what I will or won't do. I need to do it. At least you won't get pregnant."  
"I know I won't but I also know that I won't shit right for weeks. I'm not okay with you dumping your load in my insides." Freeze started to pick up the pace by thrusting upward into the heat of the assassin.  
"Ok yeah sure." He brushed the whole convo off and began to push in and out erratically.  
"That doesn't sound sincere-oh god." Fries gets back on top of Zsasz and flips him onto his belly. Zsasz's front half collapses into the pillows but his hips are held in a vice like grip as he's fucked into mercilessly. He grunts with every entry and groans with every exit of the cock in his ass. Deep rumbly moans come from freeze as he gets closer and closer to finishing. "Don't you dare do it!"  
"Sorry-not sorry." He says as he pushes hard and deep into the man under him as he cums. He milks himself in the tight and scarred body. He pulls out slowly, a trail of cum following behind.  
"You're a cunt, you know that." He started to sit up then gasped and flopped back down. "Dammit. You've rendered Oswald's body Guard unable to move." Freeze grabs a washcloth from the bathroom and comes back to clean them up. First he cuts the tape off of the assassins wrists. Then he cleans his junk and tucks himself back into his pants and moves to the assassins ass. Zsasz hears a quiet "whoops" by his ass and sighs. "I'm guessing you tore me open. Great...That would explain the burning feeling."  
"Sorry, just a bit of blood." Fries responded and wiped the last remnants of their activities from the mans body. "Do you want me to jerk you off? I feel it would only be fair if you got release too."  
"Honestly, I might be too exhausted to get it up. And my ass feels like you drove a train through it. How many inches?"  
"I've never measured."  
"Measure it, then tell me what I just felt up my ass next time I see you. Shoo. I want to sleep." Zsasz closed his eyes but heard steps come closer. A kiss was placed to his forehead before sleep took him.  
\---  
When he woke he saw that the room was no longer in disarray but his ass still felt like a bullet went right up it. He turned on his side and saw the back of a sleeping Fries. He slowly got to the edge of the bed and stood on wobbly legs. He felt a drip of something from his ass. "Goddammit." He made his way to the bathroom. The hot water in the shower stung some of his fresh tally marks but that was normal. The stinging on his face, ribs, hips, and ass was not normal. He quickly washed himself but struggled a bit with getting the cum out of his innards. He turned the water off and grabbed a towel. Fries was still asleep. He gathered his clothing and got dressed. After pacing a bit to make sure that he walked normal, he stepped out of the room and looked at his watch. Good, it's only a bit past 8pm. He can still manage to get Oswald to the meeting. He heads to Oswald's office and sees that the man is nursing a glass of wine. "Hey chief. Bout ready to go?" The mans green eyes zip to his own black ones. Oswald quickly limps to his body guard.  
"Who did this to you!? They will- they will pay for this!" The small mans anger was flaring and it was positively adorable.  
"It was a really big man but I don't know who it was. I was cornered. Don't worry though. He's sleeping now." He lied but left little bits of truth show.  
"As long as they were dealt with I suppose it's fine but are you alright? Must've been really strong for him to be able to do this to you. We will tend to your wounds later but we must be heading to the meeting. You simply must stay at the mansion for a while so that Ivy can heal you back to tip top shape." Oswald patted the assassin on the chest. The limo ride, meeting, and ride to the mansion were uneventful but once inside he was ushered to take his shirt off to tend to all of his wounds. He sat in a dining room seat and peeled his top clothing off. Both Ivy and the kingpin gasped at his tallies. Zsasz was relieved that his hips hadn't bruised yet. That would be difficult to explain. Ivy grabbed a few self-labeled bottles of who knows what and rushed back over. Penguin looked aghast at his body. He knew Zsasz marked himself but he'd never thought about the extent of it. He reached a hand out and stroked the scars so lightly that it almost itched. The assassin held the smaller mans hand to his chest and dragged the hand over his skin. Ivy scribbled some directions down on a notepad then winked very obviously at Oswald and scurried away. "Doesn't it hurt?" He spoke softly.  
"In a good way." He stated bluntly. "I could always show you." He joked letting the kingpin feel him up. Penguin grabbed the piece of paper then reached for the bottles. He poured some liquid on his hand and brought it to Victors cheek and lip.  
"It'll probably sting." Oswald said before massaging the concoction into his face. After it was rubbed in, Oswald unconsciously continued to caress his bodyguards face and lip. He seemed to realize the eyes on him and flushed red with embarrassment before moving onto the second bottle and going to apply it to the mans scarred chest and arms. The oily substance was applied to the most recent cuts. Zsasz hissed a bit at the burn. Oswald looked at the last bottle and grabbed it wondering what it could be for. He realizes that it's label is "Ivy's self warming lubricant" and his freckles become visible with his blush.  
"What? What is it?" Zsasz grabs the bottle from the small mans grip. He grins and tosses it back to the small man. "Neither of us are prepared for that yet. Maybe next time, boss." Zsasz stood up and dressed himself. "I'm tired, I'll see you in the morning." He winked at and kissed the silent, blushing man on the cheek before heading upstairs to the guest wing.  
\---  
Zsasz woke to Olga screeching at him to get up and go eat breakfast. He fully dressed before heading down to the dining room. He sat across from Oswald and asked. "The girls?"  
"They are still sleeping." He said, a slight blush dusting his cheeks. He applied jelly to a biscuit and tried to avoid eye contact.  
"Can you pass me that yogurt and fruit?" Zsasz asked and delighted in the startled shiver that went through Oswald. After that, breakfast went by quickly and funky town started playing. "Time to head to the lounge boss." He stood up and briskly made his way to the limo holding the door as the short man with a cane approached. The kingpin entered and Zsasz followed closely behind. They sat in relatively comfortable silence throughout the ride. They are greeted by Freeze at the door who's nose was swollen and busted lip was red. Zsasz fought his urge to laugh as Oswald went to question the man.  
"I fell and hit my entire face on the coffee table." His response really pulled a hard laugh from Victors throat.  
"Good job snowman!" Zsasz had a toothy smirk plastered on his face.  
"Well, what happened to you ASS-ASS-in?" He feigned ignorance to his wounds.  
"An epic battle, you know, the usual. I didn't know you were so clumsy." Oswald looked back and forth between the two usually quiet people.  
"I only have a few minutes left before I change back. Just wanted to greet you warmly one last time." He gently hugged Oswald looking over his shoulder at the assassin. "I'm really gonna miss your heat." Freeze said as he stared into the other Victors eyes. Talking to him unbeknownst to Oswald. They released each other and Oswald headed to his office and Freeze to his lab. Zsasz was free to do as he pleases so he follows the bigger Victor.  
"My ass still hurts you know." Fries just laughed hard and loud at the smaller mans confession.  
"I'm surprised you can walk. If I had time, I'd fuck you again here and now." He growled the last bit.  
"I'm glad you don't have time." He whispered hotly into his ear. The mans skin slowly returned to a shade of blue. "See you in three days." He hears a mumble. "What was that?"  
"11 inches." He stated before disappearing into his lab.


	2. Rare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No real smut. Some cute/funny/charming moments. Fries and Zsasz make their move on the King of Gotham.

With Fries back as Mr. Freeze, things more or less went back to normal. Penguin was visiting the lab more and more in the past couple of days, which was making Zsasz a bit uneasy. He worries that if Fries does manage to find the cure, his spot as right hand man was in danger. After Oswald left the lab, Zsasz decides to go check on the popsicle. He goes down the elevator and is greeted the half naked ice man. "Hey bites-a-lot. To what do I owe this pleasure?" He bowed sarcastically.  
"Funny. Just a quick question."Zsasz commented.  
"Ask away Mr. Limp Dick." Freeze said, trying to get under the assassins skin.  
Zsasz ignored the stupid name. "Do you plan to pursue a real relationship with Oswald?" The blue eyed Victor stared directly at the shorter of the two.  
"I'm not sure what I want. Right now I just have really strong urges to feel warmth with the temporary cure. I don't really feel that Os is the kind of person for a one night stand. So are you planning on a committed relationship with him?"  
"Honestly I'm not sure either. There's just something about the short-tempered little freak that sets my teeth on edge. It's probably better if you are there when I take him. I can get out of control pretty easily. I like to bite, not sure he'd enjoy it. If I go too far you need to stop me. Even if I'm really pissed about it, after I cool off I'll thank you. When he's down here, what do y'all talk about?"  
"You, most of the time." He stepped a bit closer to the body guard.  
"Hm." He gestures to expand on that.  
"Just so you know, you do scare him. It makes sense, I mean you only smile when something crazy is happening or someone's dying. But he likes you a lot, he is always worried someone will offer a higher paying job and you'll just disappear. I think that you should try to be a bit more comfortable around him; you always look ready to slice someone's throat." Fries slid his hands into his pockets and leaned on the wall.  
Zsasz smirked. "I am always ready." He reached to touch Freezes neck. The man quickly avoided his touch. "Oh yeah, sorry." He let his hand fall back to his side.  
"If we could touch, my hands would be all over you. I miss the feeling of your lips.. and your ass." The assassin chuckles a bit at the snowman's honesty.  
"I don't miss the sex, but we had completely different perspectives. Did you know that sex is about technique? You should work on yours. You do kiss well though, not like a dead fish after all. The fight was fun, maybe I'll win next time." A toothy grin appeared and both men started laughing. The sound of a cane made them turn.  
"What fun am I missing out on? I've never heard either of you laugh like that." Oswald looked between the two. Both men tried to compose themselves but it was a struggle for Zsasz. Freeze went back to his usual stone face but teeth were still visible in the assassin's grin. He held a gloved hand to his mouth.  
Freeze spoke, "It's an inside joke." The kingpin looked confused.  
"You two have inside jokes now? A week ago you would both avoid each other like the plague. I'm not understanding this development." He placed more weight onto his cane. The cold was making his leg ache more than usual.  
"We just realized we have something in common I guess. Though I wouldn't mind hitting him on his egg head with the grip of my freeze ray a few times just to get it out of my system." Fries stated in a monotone voice. Zsasz just nodded and held onto his holster straps.  
"What do you guys have in common? A scary smile?" Os said with a too polite smile for his words. Both men faked hurt at Oswald's comment. Zsasz gently tilted the kingpin's head back and kissed him softly. The resistance he expected didn't come and he pulled away. "We are both very interested in you, boss." He stroked the mans cheek and glanced at a jealous snowman. Not jealous that Zsasz kissed Os, he was jealous because his condition didn't allow him to join.  
"Oh, ooh. I didn't know either of you were really interested in me." He blushed and cleared his throat out of nervousness.  
Freeze quickly commented, " You didn't know, even though I kissed you?" He looked genuinely confused.  
"Well you always talked about wanting to feel another persons warmth and I just assumed that I was merely an outlet for that." He started chewing on his thumb.  
"You were wrong to assume that but I see why you did. Did you expect that Zsasz felt such a way about you?" The smaller Victor raised his nonexistent brows and looked to the kingpin.  
"Honestly, I didn't really think you were capable of such a thing. No offense." He raised a hand a bit in apology.  
"None taken, it's better if most people see me that way." Enemies won't look for a weak point there if he seemingly isn't capable of love. He kissed the shortest of the three again. "That one's from the popsicle." He winks at the ice man and pulls away from his boss.  
"Both of us Victors have decided to court you. Next time I use the cure, we'd like to enjoy your company." The king of Gotham was practically a tomato at this point and looked like he was gonna over heat if he stayed around for too much longer.  
"Do you need to go back up? It hurts doesn't it?" Zsasz decides to provide the little man with an escape from his embarrassment.  
"Y-Yes it does, I'll take my leave now. There are a few things that need my attention at the bar." Whiskey. Whiskey sounds great.  
"I do hope you'll join us." Zsasz whispers into the flustered mans ear before he leaves. "Well I'm getting a bit chilled. I think I'll go as well. I think I'll be seeing you tomorrow as well. This was fun." He waved at Mr. Freeze and turned on his heel to exit the lab.  
"Those pants really accentuate your ass. Are you showing off or are you ignorant to the temptation you put in me?"  
"I just like these pants, my ass has nothing to do with why." He left the lab with a sway to his hips. Fries just watches him leave, blue eyes glued to the fuckable body.  
\---  
Zsasz makes his way towards the bar and just watches from a distance as the penguin complains to Ivy about what he should do. He catches a bit of conversation. "I don't think I'm ready for such an intimate session with two men. I feel like I'll die of embarrassment if I make eye contact with either of them now." He downs more whiskey.  
Ivy squeals, "Wow, a threesome?" She pushes his shoulder with a giggle. She didn't expect him to fall over and right off of the bar stool. He lands with a thud and yelps. Ivy cracks up while helping him back up. Once standing he dusts himself off. "You alright Pengy?"  
"I'm fine Ivy!" He looks to where Zsasz is standing and his eyes widen. "It's not polite to eavesdrop Victor!" Zsasz just shrugs.  
"I thought my job was to make sure you don't die. Kinda difficult to do that if I'm not near you. Don't worry, I didn't hear... much." The kingpin blushes and spins on his heel.  
"Goodbye Ivy, I think it's time that I head back to the mansion. Victor, go grab the first file on my desk. I'm heading out to the limo."  
"Yes boss." He quickly gets the file and makes his way to the limo. The door is still open and penguin sits inside with his legs crossed. He scoots right next to the smaller man.  
"Um, Victor."  
"Yeah boss?" He wraps his arm around Oswald.  
"What, are you doing?" He tries to scoot away.  
"I'm courting you by providing skinship." He squeezes Oswald's shoulder and presses the man into his side.  
"Oh, did Freeze say something to you?" He stopped trying to get away and relaxed into his bodyguards hold.  
"Possibly." He ran his hand through the wilting spikes of black hair on the penguins head. The kingpin yawned and slept through the long ride to the mansion. "We're here boss." He gently runs his hand through the mans hair as he wakes him. He opens his eyes slowly and sits up and away from Victor.  
"I apologize Victor. It must've been very boring during the long ride." He slides out of the limo followed by the bodyguard.  
Victor smiled. "Not at all." He stated bluntly making the penguin pause. "You are very cute when asleep, unplagued by stress." He sees the small mans ears flush red as he just continues to walk up to the doors and inside. Not responding simply because he doesn't know how to respond to such comments is something else the assassin loves about him. The awkwardness and clumsiness of the bird feeds the predator inside of Zsasz. He stands outside lost in thought until he's interrupted.  
"Aren't you coming in Victor?!" The kingpin yelled out the main door.  
"Oh, yes." He quickly steps into the mansion. He goes to the guest room to change his clothes to loungewear. He is in the middle of pulling on the black silk pants Oswald had brought him for his stay at the mansion when there's a knock on the door. When he opens it, Oswald is face to chest with the half naked sadist. "Yes boss?"  
"YOU COULD'VE SAID YOU WERE CHANGING!" He goes to cover his eyes but he's instead being hugged to the scar riddled chest.  
"Relax boss, you've seen me without a shirt before." He nibbles the kingpins ear and moves down his neck and places a chaste kiss to his jugular then pulls away and starts to button up his shirt. "What did you need?" He looks at the man in the doorway.  
"Oh um, regarding you and Fries... as you know I've not much experience with relationships of any kind. I might be willing to give you two a chance but I need to know that it won't go too far, that if I say stop, you will, and that our private lives will stay separate from our public lives." He puts out his hand.  
"I agree, but this isn't a business deal." He grabs the offered hand and uses it to pull the man to his silk clad chest. Os looks up into black orbs and his lips are devoured by the taller. Zsasz walks them to the bed and they both end up swallowed in the comforter. "Why are you still wearing this?" Clothes are being stripped off of the kingpin in record time and it begins to make him panic.  
"Victor I'm no-" He's shushed with a kiss.  
Victor pulls away for a second. "Don't worry, I made a promise to a snowman." He sits them up. "Kissing is okay, right boss?"  
Oswald nodded before speaking, "I'm not your boss right now, Victor." He bashfully fluttered his eyelashes. Tongue and teeth are quickly clashing with his own as Victor groans into his mouth.  
"Not making this easier." He put emphasis on what he meant by grinding his boner on a thigh. The bird squeaked at the realization of how riled up he got the assassin. Zsasz mouths at Oswald's neck. He's just itching to bite into the soft flesh. He instead bites his own lip so hard that it bleeds. A breathy sigh leaves his mouth as he moves back into a sitting position. "Well, how bout dinner?"  
"But you're..." He stares at Victors hard on. Then blushes when he notices he's been caught.  
"I was planning on taking care of it in the bathroom. Unless you actually want me to completely and utterly destroy you." Victor looked back at Oswald with a dead serious eyes. Os shook his head so Victor kissed him on the forehead and headed for the bathroom.  
\---  
~ Meanwhile ~  
A woman sneaks into the iceberg lounge with a blow torch and makes her way to the centerpiece.  
\---  
When Victor comes out of the bathroom he's surprised to see that Oswald hasn't left and is redressed in his outfit. "Shall we head down to dinner Victor?" Oswald's nasally voice asks. Zsasz moves to stand next to Os. "I could eat." Victor says then begins toward the stairs to head down. Penguin quickly follows behind. They sit at the table, Oswald at the head and Zsasz at the closest side chair. Os pours white wine into two glasses before holding one up.  
"To a new relationship." He smiles his best smile as Zsasz just replies with a 'yes' and clinks their glasses together but sets it down instead of drinking. Olga walks in with appetizers and sets them down. Then she looks at Oswald.  
She speaks one word, "Steak?" Then looks back at Oswald expectantly.  
"Oh! Victor, how do you like your steak?" Victor looks up.  
"Rare, bloody." He smiles then goes back to seriously poking at a green bean with his fork.  
Oswald snickers a bit, he should've known. "One rare and one well." Olga then hurries back into the kitchen. "Do you not drink?" Zsasz looks up from the green bean once more.  
"I may not look it, but I don't hold my liquor well." He purses his lips together.  
Oswald chuckles a bit, "Even a lightweight should be able to handle a glass of white wine. I'm guessing you never really look into what is really strong, you just avoid alcohol all together. I thought you were more of a risk taker." The assassin seems to take it as an insult and picks up the glass and swishes it around before sipping it. His nose scrunches up in distaste but he finishes it anyway, one small sip at a time before setting the empty glass down. He then sees the kingpin seriously struggling not to laugh. Victors brow knits together.  
"Huh?" He looks at the host who calms himself to speak.  
"You just looked so miserable when drinking it. You really didn't have to finish it. Pfft! That's the first time I've seen you dislike something so terribly. Most often you're either indifferent, itching to attack, or happy killing." Victor uncharacteristically breaks eye contact and looks back to his plate.  
"Gross." He mutters it like a kid who had to eat broccoli. This made Os burst into another fit of laughter. Zsasz glared at him. Olga came in and placed their steaks down. Given something else to focus on, the bodyguard grabs his fork and knife then begins to saw at the meat, blood seeping out from the pressure. Zsasz looks a bit like an animal and the penguin just watches him shove a piece of bloody meat into his mouth. He's caught and Victor just nods at Oswald to eat his own food. They both devour their food quickly. When they're done they just look at each other. Zsasz grins and stands up pulling Oswald with him to head up the stairs. They both end up in Victors guest room.  
"Sleep with me tonight. You look tired, nightmares? A cuddle buddy could be helpful." Zsasz unbuttons his own shirt and sits on the edge of the bed pulling back the beds comforter.  
"I need to change clothes then." He goes to leave. His hand is caught.  
"Why? You're wearing underwear right?"  
"Yes of course. But my chest gets cold." He makes an excuse but Victor isn't having it. He makes quick work of stripping the Kingpin down to his boxers that are black and decorated with little emperor penguins. Zsasz spares a glance at the pattern before moving back to the task at hand. He pulls his previously discarded silk shirt around penguin and meets no resistance sliding his arms into the sleeves. He buttons it up and slides his hands down the front of the shirt, feeling him up just a little.  
"There. Problem solved." Zsasz slides into the bed and pats the spot next to him.  
"Fine, but only for tonight." He crawls underneath the blankets and snuggles up to the warm scarred chest. Victor wraps his arms around him and they both fall into a comfortable, warm, deep, and dreamless sleep.


	3. Dealing with an old flame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ed Nygma is free from his icy prison. Temporary cure has a side effect? Zsasz really just wants to torture people. Sofia Falcone is in Gotham. Will Ed keep Oswald from attending his date with the two Victors?  
> Contains spoilers from S4E4.

Penguin slept without nightmares. Zsasz woke up early but didn't want to disturb the bird so he just lays next to him, running his fingers through the short black locks. Two or three hours pass before he sees blurry green eyes drearily open. They fill with life as they meet the black eyes staring back at them. "Sleep well?" Victor asked. Oswald just nodded sleepily and stretched. "Let's take a shower then head down for breakfast." Victor began to get out of bed.  
"Shower together?" Os asks quietly while blushing. Os thinks, 'It's too early to already be getting embarrassed, lets try to be confident like I am about everything else.' So he gets up and follows Victor to the bathroom. Oswald decides he'll start the shower then undress. After starting the water he turns around and sees a stark naked body right in his face. He makes an 'oop' noise as he stares directly at Victors half hard morning wood. Victor crouches down and unbuttons Oswald's shirt for him.  
"Are you gonna take your own underwear off or do I have to do that too?" At that, the kingpin quickly slips his undies off and hops in the shower before he can get embarrassed about being naked. Zsasz wasn't far behind and steps into the shower behind Os. The penguin expects something inappropriate to happen but instead, shampoo is drizzled into his hair and hands begin massaging his scalp. 'These hands are the same hands that kill people daily and I have them massaging my head.' The penguin thinks and lets out a snicker. "Hm?" Victor questions.  
The bird turns and faces the assassin. "It's kinda funny." Victor furrows his hairless brow as penguin grabs his hands. "It's funny because so many people fear these hands of yours. And here you are washing my hair with them." He runs his fingers over the knuckles and lets them go.  
"I'm not just a sadist for hire. I'm a hedonist. I live in the moment, usually not thinking about the past or future. It's gotten me in trouble a few times, but nothing I couldn't handle. You though, I'm much more talkative around you, and contrary to my ways, I think about a future with you." Suddenly his chest is enveloped by warmth as a kingpin hugs him.  
Said kingpin begins to speak, "Victor, you truly will be by my side forever. Right?"  
"Forever and always Oswald." A phone rings from the bedroom.  
"Shit." Penguin scrubs his body with soap, rinses his hair and body off, then hops out of the shower so fast that Victor doesn't know what to do besides make way for the now frustrated little man. He continues taking his time in the hot water. "WHAT!? WHO WOULD DO SUCH A THING?! " Victor hears yelling and gets out of the shower, wrapping a towel around his waist. He sees an angry Cobblepot throw his phone. He turns on his heels to face Victor. "Victor! We are heading to the lounge now!" Without questioning what happened he watches the short man clad in a towel limp out of the room.  
\---  
A calm bodyguard and fuming crime boss head to the iceberg lounge in a limo. When inside, they see one of Penguins goons standing next to an empty and half melted ice block. "NO! THIS CANNOT BE HAPPENING!" Oswald stomps his feet like an angered child as he goes to the melted ice.  
Zsasz can't help but comment, "I dunno.. Kinda, opens up the room." He watches as the angry kingpin turns and marches straight to the goon.  
"HOW COULD YOU LET THIS HAPPEN?! YOU ONLY HAVE ONE JOB! KEEP PEOPLE OUT!" Before the man can explain himself the kingpin beats him to the floor with his cane and grabs a jagged piece of ice. "YOU. FAILED. ME." He punctuates each word with a stab in the throat. He turns again to face Zsasz. "I want whoever did this FOUND and I want them DEAD! And I want EDWARD BACK HERE TONIGHT!" He screams and spits the words out. Zsasz grins and departs from the kingpin.  
\---  
~meanwhile~  
A lady in a dress decorated in ?s gets knocked out by a downgraded Ed Nygma.  
\---  
Penguin heads down to Freezes lab to rant but he sees the man sleeping at his desk. He didn't know he really slept at all. I guess anyone can sleep if they're tired enough. His anger dissipates and quietly goes over to the desk to see what he was working on. There are two matching rings and a third ring with an extra gem on it. A blue sapphire is in the middle of it. Os clasps a hand over his mouth and makes his way out of the lab. He's been sitting at the bar drinking for less than an hour when his phone rings. "Yes?" He swallows down more whiskey.  
"Boss, I found the culprit." He tells Oswald the address.  
\---  
Victor and Zsasz stand in front of a woman tied to a chair. "Where is he!?" The lady cries harder.  
"I don't know! He knocked me out after I went through all that trouble to help him! But some good it did.." She paused.  
"Well. SPIT IT OUT!"  
"The ice broke his brain. He can't even solve simple riddles. What's green and then red and goes round and round?" They stare at her for a second.  
Victor speaks, "Frog in a blender!" Penguin makes a face at Zsasz.  
The lady sobs, "Exactly. He couldn't even solve that."  
"It does seem unlike Ed to keep this, rube alive. Sound the word. I want him found."  
"And her?" Victor questions.  
"A lot of people have been trying to steal from me lately. An example needs to be made." Penguin looks to the assassin. "Have fun Victor." He pats him on the shoulder and leaves the room. Zsasz immediately pulls out a gun and points it at her. He glances at her outfit.  
"Love your dress."  
She chokes on her words, "Thank you.*sniffle*I made it myself." She trembles.  
"Hm." Victor hums with a smile, then he shoots her in the head.  
\---  
Meanwhile, Ed struggles to write riddles.  
\---  
"I'm gonna stab you." Victor whispers during Penguins chat with Sofia.  
When Sofia leaves, the kingpin melts down into his chair but is soon interrupted again by two guys with a rap from Ed. "My once friend Oswald now my foe, it's me Ed just so you know, it's time we meet I think you'll agree, you'll find me where the Earth meets the sky, where water flows and birds fly by, at dusk we'll meet, I'll see you there, We'll settle things unless you're scared." Zsasz moves his head to the beat. When they're done, Oswald slumps over his desk.  
Then Victor speaks, "We should torture them, just get them to tell us where Nygma is."  
The guys immediately get defensive, "He just found us on the street!"  
Victor retorts, "Well that's exactly what you would say."  
"LEAVE!" Penguin yells at the two men and they make their escape. Victor looks disappointed. "That barmaid was clearly mistaken. He's up to all of his old tricks. So I'll meet him." He stands from his chair. "You and your men will hide nearby, attack when I say. Do NOT kill Ed though. I want Victor to freeze him again."  
Zsasz gets confused, "Huh?"  
"Not you! The other Victor!" Oswald shouts.  
"Oh." Zsasz relaxes again.  
Oswald ponders the riddle. "He obviously means the pier. Gather your men. I want Edward Nygma."

Later 

They find Sofia telling off her fathers loyalists and penguin kills them. "I was a worm on your hook." Sofia says.  
"With one difference my dear, worms are usually eaten. You should plant roses, it masks the smell." With that, Victor and Oswald leave Sofia alone.  
\---  
"I went to the pier. I waited, Ed didn't show." Os looks at the two men. "He-Oh just get on with it!" He shouts at them.  
Beat boxing starts and the other begins, "I waited and waited but you never came, you must be a coward, or worse a lame brain. I'll give you one chance to make it right. Meet me again this time at midnight, I'll make this one easy, this place makes some people lie, some people speak, and some people cry."  
Oswald stares at them hard for a minute before throwing his hands up and speaking. "Honestly that could be anything." He sighs.  
"Can we please just torture them now?" Victor says as his boss sighs at the second useless riddle rap.  
"WHY NOT!?" Oswald nearly screams. Victors men grab the two guys and drag them away. Oswald downs more whiskey.  
\---  
Edward Nygma stomps into the lounge. "Oswald! I waited for you! Again! And you didn't show! Again! Coward. Where are you!?"  
The kingpin enters the room. "Here. And I may be many things, but I am not a coward." Ed points his gun at the short man as he continues to speak. "Your riddles suck. You're just describing a range of human behavior!"  
Ed gets frustrated, "NO! I meant lying! Lying as in lying-laying down! As in dead!"  
"Oh." Os is taken aback.  
"The answer was cemetery. Clearly. Only an idiot wouldn't see that." Ed says.  
Os speaks up again. "Face it Ed. You can't make riddles to save your ass anymore. I guess she was right." Ed cuts in with a 'what, who was right?'. "Your number one fan. She said that there was something wrong with you. *scoff* Took me a while to believe it but, you're not smart!"  
"I am smart. I'm the riddler." He mutters a bit.  
"Oh god that name again. Tell me. How long did it take you to come up with those riddles?" Oswald mocks him a bit.  
"I don't know." Ed says dumbly.  
"A minute, two minutes?" The kingpin prods further.  
"A couple of hours. SIX HOURS!" Nygma gets fed up.  
"Six hours?" Os scoffs.  
"Yes!" Eds bottom teeth become visible as he shouts.  
"For two bad riddles. Does that sound anything like the old you?" The penguin steps closer to the disgruntled man.  
"Well perhaps I'm still recovering FROM BEING FROZEN, IN A BLOCK OF ICE! But revenge will certainly make me feel better." He shouts bitterly.  
"You will never have revenge on me." Oswald turns and begins to walk away.  
"Oh, yeah, I will!" He points the gun back at Oswald.  
"Uh, no, you won't." Os shakes his head at the man.  
"Oswald! I'm gonna shoot you." His hand trembles.  
The king pin sighs. "Yes. You might shoot me. Might even kill me. But only he can get revenge on me. The man I froze on that pier. The man who would've killed himself before writing those idiotic riddles! The man whose name I still will not speak! But he's gone. You're just Ed Nygma, and not even Ed Nygma. Because Ed would've noticed something."  
"What?" He questions.  
"Doesn't it feel kind of chilly in here?" Freeze steps around the corner and shoots a small blast from his freeze ray to make an entrance. "You remember him?" Os moves to stand next to the Icy man. "My other Victor. I'm going to put you on ice again."  
The cold Victor pipes up. "You want the same pose, or something else?"  
"Wait please." Ed puts his hands in front of him.  
Freeze aims the ray. "Got it, same pose."  
"Okay Oswald! I'm not the riddler. Do it." Victor steps toward the defeated man.  
"Stop." The kingpin says. "I've changed my mind. I'm not gonna freeze you. I'd only be freezing Ed Nygma. Who cares about that? No. Better revenge is having you live, knowing you are not him. And you never will be again. Goodbye Ed." Oswald walks away. Leaving him speechless. Fries and Oswald head back down to the lab to talk and get ready for the date the Victors had planned for Os.  
Freeze speaks after he takes off his suit. "Three days have finally passed. Oh, just wondering, am I gonna have to worry about him?"  
Oswald bout breaks his neck turning to look at the white haired man. "What do you mean?"  
"Well, you had like.. a thing for him before right? Just wondering if I'm going to have to worry about competition." Oswald's demeanor changes from tense to relaxed albeit a bit embarrassed.  
"No. But shouldn't you be more worried about Zsasz? We slept together last night- non sexually of course but shouldn't he be more worrisome?" Freeze just shakes his head.  
"He doesn't count, cause I'm after him too." Oswald chuckles at the response.  
"Well? What did you want to talk about?"  
"I've realized that there is some sort of side effect from the temporary cure. It's a good one though. I've realized that even after I returned to my Mr. Freeze persona, I laugh at jokes and have well, feelings. The feelings get duller as time goes on but it's nice. I thought I should tell you that. If in the future I haven't used the temporary cure in a long time and I act jaded and unfeeling, just know that I'm not really feeling the way I might act. In fact I wouldn't be feeling feeling anything at all. If you find me like that, try to convince me to take the temporary cure. Remind me of this day." He goes and grabs the cure and something else off his desk. He stuffs the other thing in his pocket and walks back to the elevator where the quiet and blushing Os is waiting. He drinks the glowy liquid and immediately leans against the wall.  
"Are you okay? Victor?" The kingpin worries heavily about the man but doesn't touch the still very cold guy.  
"Yeah, it just feels like lava is going through my veins for a second. Gimme a moment." He breathes harshly as his skin changes to a normal pale tone. "Okay. Let's go get Zsasz." They head back up to the lounge where there are now three mannequins lined up wearing different suits. One white suit with a light blue vest, a mostly black suit with pale blues for the buttons, trim, and vest, and lastly a pale blue suit with a white vest decorated with pale blue snowflakes. "For me?" Fries questions already knowing the answer. He makes his choice and changes into the suit that was on the first mannequin. "I'll wear them in the order they are in." He smiles at Oswald. "Where is Zsasz?" Victor asks.  
"Probably out by the limo. He said, and I quote, 'I don't want to see the bride before he comes down the isle.' He's quite silly contrary to his looks huh?" Victor smiles wholeheartedly.  
"He's much more fitting to be a bride than me. A veil would look great atop his shiny bald head, don't you think, Oswald?" They laugh in agreement as they head out of the lounge.


	4. Whiskey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's finally time for the date. Zsasz and Oswald get drunk. Fries has to deal with them. They have the mansion to themselves. Will Zsasz be able to restrain himself around Os? Will Fries get any action? The Victors love to argue.

As he walks out of the lounge with Oswald, Fries thinks, 'I hope I was right to trust Zsasz to choose the place and make reservations.' He sees Zsasz standing next to the limo wearing an all black suit. 'And he looks like he's attending a funeral, great.' Zsasz speaks up noticing the dislike of his outfit, "It was either this or my bright lime green disco outfit. I thought that would be a bit loud for a first date." Oswald's eyes pop out at the thought of his assassin in a lime green outfit dancing to disco music.  
"Has anyone ever told you that your interests don't match your looks?" Oswald questions.   
"I don't talk to many people but Falcone once said something along those lines. He didn't talk me often, but when he did, it was either an order or a comment on my eccentricity." Zsasz seemed to reminisce happily about the retired crime boss.   
"Falcone huh." The kingpin muttered. It would have angered Oswald had it been anyone but a happy Zsasz speaking of Falcone. It does worry the kingpin a bit that his assassin has a soft spot for the old man. 'No. tonight is supposed to be a worry free, fun night. I can't be thinking like this.' Oswald swats the thoughts away and gets into the limo after Zsasz and is followed by Fries. They head to their destination.  
When they arrive at the restaurant Fries reads the name, "Whiskey's refined eatery. I've literally never even heard of this place."   
"This has been my secret sanctuary for years. I reserved a private room for us tonight." He steps out of the limo and holds the door for Oswald while Fries gets out on the other side. They make their way to the back of the restaurant and past a curtain where there's a curved couch, table, and love-seat. They sit at the table and look at the menus.   
Oswald flips to the drinks and sees that there are three pages dedicated to drinks. "Victor, are you under the impression that I'm a drunk?" He looks at Zsasz. He just shrugs in reply. "If you weren't before, then you will be after tonight. Such a vast array of beverages. I can't resist."   
~2 hours later~  
"Fun fact. This was the first and only place I ever got drunk." Victor says while sipping a fruity cocktail.  
"Such a girly drink shazz." Oswald says, unable to properly say Victors name in his drunken state. "Dis, is a mans drink." He gulps down another big glass of whiskey.  
"And cut off." Fries says and hands Os a glass of water. "You're drunk Os."   
"I am not! Well maybe a wittle." He leans his head on Fries.  
Fries feels a kick to the shin and glares at the other Victor. "Are you a child Victor?" He receives a pouty look from Zsasz. "Are you drunk too? My god I feel like a babysitter." Another kick. "Stop it." Another one. "What did I just say?" Another one. "Hey!" Another one. Fries stands up and goes to the other side of the table. Oswald melts down into the seat where Fries was and starts mumbling about god knows what. The smaller Victor dodges the hand reaching for him and climbs on top of Oswald.  
"Victor?" A blushing kingpin questions in a soft voice at the man above him. Teeth and tongue are suddenly all over his neck. He gasps and moans as a hickey is sucked into his neck. Fries pries Victor from Os and sits between them. He deals out water to each of the men and sighs.   
Then the smaller Victor attacks his neck. "Zsasz, calm down. Wait till you and him sober up a little and we'll head home." The assassin slumps down into his seat and drinks his water like a scolded kid. Oswald falls asleep. After an hour passes they head back to the limo. Os relies heavily on his cane, Fries has a hand to Oswald's back, and Victor has his hands stuffed in his pockets. They get in the limo. "You guys better now?"   
"I'm now only a little tipsy." Os responds.  
"'m fine." Zsasz says. He's curled in on himself.  
"So we have a jealous and handsy drunk. And we have a sleepy-"  
The kingpin cuts him off. "I don't have a set way I act. Mostly I'm an angry emotional drunk, you were just lucky tonight."  
Zsasz faces the window. 'A jealous and handsy drunk. That's exactly why I don't like drinking. Great. I've made a fool of myself.' He sighs and presses a hand to his forehead.  
"Okay. Well let's get home. You still up for this Os?" A blushing nod is the only response he gets.   
When they get to the mansion Oswald leads the group, more stable on his feet than earlier. "Ivy is out with bridgit tonight. Olga is visiting family. We have the place to ourselves tonight." He heads up the stairs and leads the two men into his bedroom. Zsasz hugs the kingpin from behind and attacks his neck again and unbuttons Oswalds vest and shirt. Fries begins taking his own clothes off and folding them off to the side. Soon the bodyguard has a naked king under him. He peels off his own clothes till he is also in the nude. He kisses the trembling man beneath him as he rubs his aching member against a thigh. It takes all of his willpower to not just ruin the penguin and push in to the hilt.   
"Fries! You got anything?" Victor grunts out. A blue tube of lube lands on the bed. He coats two fingers in it and presses one digit into the quivering man. Oswald squirms at the feeling but doesn't move away until a second finger presses against his entrance.   
"Wait! I'm scared." Os stops the hand at his ass. But a kiss loosens his grip and the finger slides in. Zsasz pulls the digits mostly out and pushes them back in a few times before a third digit is added and pushed in. "It hurts.." Oswald pulls away from the kiss and closes his eyes.   
Zsasz whispers into his ear, "It's okay, relax. Just breathe." He pushes the fingers in deeper this time. Nails rake down his chest and over old scars. Victor moans at the sting of the scratches. After working the fingers in Oswald for a good minute, he pulls them out and rubs his cock on the stretched hole.  
Oswald's hands shoot down to keep Zsasz from moving his hips. His hands are just grabbed and held above his head. "Please hold on for just a second Zsasz!" Oswald pleads. All he gets is a growl and teeth lodged into his shoulder. "Ow fuck!" The teeth retreat.  
"Tell me when you're ready." And the mouth latches back on to the bite and sucks on the probably bleeding wound. Oswald tries to mentally prepare himself. His hands are released. He can tell that Zsasz is going easy on him. 'He's trying for me so I'll have to try for him.' He thinks and wraps his arms around the assassins neck.  
"Okay." As soon as the word leaves his mouth the tip pushes in. "Shit..ugh..Kiss me." Os tries to focus on the kiss instead of the pain. Another quick thrust and Zsasz is completely inside of Oswald. A breathy sigh leaves him as he relishes in the heat surrounding him. Glancing to the wall behind him he can see Fries stroking his ridiculously huge dick to full hardness.   
"Can I move?" Victor asks, knowing full well it still hurts. Oswald nods even though he isn't really ready. He pulls out until just the tip is inside, then he pushes all the way back in slowly. There's a lot of friction so he drizzles more of the lubricant where they are connected. He begins to pick up the pace until he's rocking the whole bed with every thrust. Hands push at his chest now trying to slow him down but he continues. He only slows when he sees the red face and tears of the man trapped underneath him. "Please bear with it for a little longer."  
The kingpin shakes his head. "I can't! I can't!" He looks to Fries for help. Fries told Zsasz that he wouldn't stop him but maybe he can still help somehow. He goes to the bed and hears Zsasz growl at him.   
"Try a different position. I think there's one that helps ease the pain for the bottom." He winks at Victor. The assassin not so gently flips them so that Oswald's on top and Zsasz is leaning against the headboard. The bird readjusts his position so that his leg is more comfortable and begins riding Zsasz at a painfully slow pace. Hands rub circles on Oswald's hips in an effort to keep himself from just impaling him on his dick. Oswald plants his hands on Zsasz's belly as he picks up his pace. He's moving faster but not going far enough down and it's chipping away at Victors resolve to go easy. He thrusts up shallowly when Oswald moves down and it pulls a groan from his own throat.   
Os seems to tolerate it so it continues until he feels himself getting close. "Boss, I'm close.." Hearing Zsasz call him boss pushes Oswald to the edge and he cums on his bodyguards chest. He tightens around the assassin. "Fuck!" Zsasz pulls Oswald flush against him as he cums. Before he's done he pulls out and strokes the rest of it out on his and Oswald's stomachs. Oswald rolls off of him and into the pillows breathing heavily. Zsasz feels like sleeping but is soon reminded of the other man in the room. Fries climbs onto the bed and flips Victor onto his belly. "Uh oh." A small amount of lube is poured onto his asshole. He looks behind him and sees a smirking snowman stroking 11 inches of slightly lubed and uncensored pain.   
Fries leans over the assassin and whispers into his ear. "Might want to bite the pillow. Don't wanna scare Ossy right?" Before Zsasz can really do anything to prepare himself, Victor has sheathed more than half of his pain rod inside. A yelp escapes his throat before he has his teeth clamped down on the pillow. Oswald rolls back to face the action and his eyes widen at the sheer size of Victors meat stick and that Zsasz is taking it. A squeal and glare are aimed at Fries when the tall man bears down harder on the bodyguards back with each push. When he's fully sheathed inside, he gyrates and grinds into the bald man. He reaches forward and wraps his hands around Zsasz's neck, pulling him up and back against him. Zsasz claws at the hands around his neck but it doesn't do any good. "Have you been on the receiving end of a bite like yours before? I'll show you." Teeth are gently scraping his shoulder before they clamp down hard and he can feel the skin break. Zsasz let's out a screeching sound that is quickly quelled by one large hand moving from his throat to cover his mouth. Thrusts quicken and become more forceful and erratic.  
Zsasz chokes out a few words behind the hand. "Not again!"  
"Too late." Fries is completely inside when he cums. He then thrusts even harder and somehow deeper than before. The cum is being forced deeper inside of Victor and he tries to escape the hands holding him in place.   
"Why are you still cumming?! Stop it!" Zsasz starts pushing as hard as he can against Victors hips. The wind is then crushed out of his lungs as he's held much tighter than before.  
"I don't know but stop fucking fighting me." He lays them back down onto the bed and keeps thrusting into the thrashing man. He finally feels the last bit come out and pulls out of the exhausted body.  
"You suck." Zsasz says into the pillow.  
"You swallow." Fries retorts. Oswald begins laughing at their exchange. Both men turn and look at the kingpin.  
"Talk about a taste of your own medicine. Hurts doesn't it." He devolves into another giggle fit.  
"I'm not eleven fucking inches." Zsasz shoots a glare at Fries.  
"I don't growl and bite people. I only bit you because you bit me and Os." Fries says.  
"Shut up assface." The assassin pouts.  
"I know you are but what am I?" Fries mocks the childish behavior.   
Zsasz kisses him full on the lips then pushes him away again. "I said shut up."   
"Can someone go get a rag?" Oswald interrupts their bickering.  
Zsasz looks at Fries, "You should do it since you're the only one without cum dripping from your ass."   
"Can't argue with that." Fries goes to the bathroom and comes back with two warm washcloths. He hands Victor one to do it himself but goes and helps Oswald get himself cleaned up.  
"I have to do it myself? I see how it is." He begins wiping himself off while pouting.  
"Well you're experienced. He's not." Fries explains.   
Oswald's eyes bug out at that. "Zsasz is experienced in taking it?!"  
Fries chuckles, "Only experienced in taking mine."   
Oswald's eyes get even wider. "What! When?"  
Zsasz speaks up. "Remember how I got beat up and he fell on his entire face?" Oswald nods. "Well, we both lied. We actually fought and beat each other the fuck up. Then he fucked me. It hurt. A lot. He's a cunt."   
Oswald's mouth dangles open at the little story. Then he looks at Fries seriously. "Did he cry like I did?"  
"Oh yeah, like a little bitch baby. I even went easy on him." Fries grins.  
"Easy my ass! He tore me open! I bled!" Zsasz glares at both of the other men.  
"He only bled a little." He makes a tiny gesture with his fingers. Zsasz makes a 'humph' noise and crawls under the blankets with Oswald. Fries follows the cue and snuggles up behind Zsasz who's spooning Oswald.   
They argue a bit more about trivial things before they are hushed by Oswald mumbling an, "I love you both." The trio falls asleep listening to each other's heartbeats.  
\---  
When morning arrives, Zsasz thinks he's the first to rise but notices only he and Oswald are in the bed. He slips out of the blankets and puts a robe over his bruised body then heads downstairs to look for the snowman. He sees Fries in the kitchen with a cup of coffee. The man is only wearing boxer briefs and a pair of white socks. "Morning, cunt. My hips, ribs and ass feel like I forgot the safe word." Zsasz comments.  
"I feel very refreshed this morning. Is Os still asleep?" Zsasz just nods and grabs the mans cup of coffee. He takes a sip and sets the cup back down immediately.  
"You drink your coffee black? Gross." Zsasz pours himself a cup but adds milk and sugar to it.  
"I've never tried it any other way." At those words a cup of sweetened coffee is shoved into his face.  
"Its way better this way." Zsasz says as the man takes a sip of his coffee.  
"Too sweet. But good, I guess." Fries replies. Zsasz just scoffs and finishes the cup. They hear a thump and a yell come from upstairs. "He probably can't walk."  
"Yeah, no, definitely not." They race up the stairs and see a disgruntled little man on the floor next to the bed among scattered pillows.  
"Why do my legs feel like goddamn jello?" He glares at his limbs.  
"Probably because I fucked you senseless last night." Zsasz smirks at his own comment.  
"How can you walk?" Oswald asks Zsasz.  
"I'm a tough cookie." He replies.  
"I'll give you guys massages later okay?" Fries says.  
"That sounds good." Os says.  
"I deserve it after dealing with your dick." Zsasz mumbles.  
They manage to get Oswald dressed and down to the dining room table. Fries cooks breakfast and soon they are all eating bacon, eggs, and toast. Once they are mostly finished, Fries goes upstairs and comes back with a little bag. He walks over to Zsasz and Oswald. He pulls three rings from the bag. He places one on his own ring finger, a matching one on Zsasz, and one with a blue sapphire in the middle on Oswald.  
\---  
Meanwhile, Ed fails at robbery and bumps into Solomon Grundy.  
\---  
"I figure it's a bit soon to get married but I'd like you both to wear them if that's alright." Fries says.   
"Of course I'll wear it, it's beautiful Victor!" Oswald delightedly exclaims.  
Zsasz nods, "It's blue. I like blue." He examines the ring. Oswald laughs cutely at the blunt words and stands up. He gives Fries a kiss on the cheek and Zsasz a kiss on his forehead. "You make me want to attack you." The assassin says as he grabs Oswald's hand. He kisses the kingpins palm.  
"Maybe later." Os says while blushing.  
Fries chimes in, "What about me? I modified the temporary cure and it should last two more days after tonight. I've been working on making it last a week but the data hasn't come back yet."  
The shorter Victor responds, "Great, so I'm gonna have to protect my ass more often." He grins at the tallest of the three then answers the initial question. "I'll suck you off or something. He still can't take you, and I'm not confident in my ability to take you again so soon."  
Os speaks up. "Victor-" they both look at him. He shakes his head. "Zsasz, what do I have to do today?"   
"Nothing really except visiting the lounge and some paperwork. Oh yeah, my girls said that Gordon has been poking around the warehouses. You want me to deal with him or do you want to talk to him personally?" The assassin responds.  
The kingpin sighs. "I'd love to send you, but he'd probably just take it as a threat and pursue me even more. He's been really annoying lately but I'll see what he wants. Let's head to the lounge. He's probably already snooping around there." Both Victors nod and they all go get dressed and head to the lounge.


End file.
